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120+ Hilarious Clock Puns to Pass the Time

A whimsical illustration of anthropomorphic clocks in a vibrant comic book style, engaging in a stand-up comedy show, with the clocks telling puns to each other in a bright, colorful setting with spee

Time flies when you’re having fun, but what about when you’re reading clock puns? Buckle up, because you’re in for a timeless treat!

We’ve prepared a collection of tick-tock-ing hilarious clock puns that are sure to make you laugh till your battery runs out.

Whether you’re a punctual person or someone who’s always a tad behind, these puns will help you keep a smile on your face as you watch the hours pass by.

Clock Puns

  • Why did the clock get thrown out of class? Because it was tocking too much!
  • Did you hear about the hungry clock? It went back four seconds.
  • What makes a clock tick? Too much tocking!
  • What’s a clock’s favorite type of music? Rock around the clock.
  • Time and tide wait for no man, but they always wait for a clock repairman.
  • I’ve got a friend who’s a sushi chef and also repairs clocks – he’s making me a timetuna sandwich!
  • My clock is very old… it’s been around the block a few times.
  • The clock manufacturer was late to work. His excuse? Better late than lever!”
  • Why did the clock go to the principal’s office? It was way past its time.
  • I’ve got a funny feeling about this… oh wait, that’s just my alarm clock!

Hilarious Clock Puns

  • Why did the clock join the band? Because it had great timing!
  • My clock couldn’t stop laughing… It was a real tickle-tocker.
  • Why don’t clocks play hide and seek? They can never wind down.
  • That clock’s new feature? It’s tick-tacular!
  • Can a clock go backward? Of course not, it’s all wound up!
  • The clock was arrested for theft. It was doing time!
  • What do you call a funny clock? A humtick!
  • Do you know what time it is? No, let me check my tock-et watch!
  • The clock told great jokes but it always delivered them second-hand.
  • Time loops had clocks getting dizzy and feeling pretty second-now-sick.

Check Out: 130 Time Puns – From Tick-Tock Laughs to Dark Humor Delights

Funny Clock Puns

  • Why don’t clocks ever need a break? They just can’t stop ticking.
  • My grandfather clock has a wild sense of humor – it’s a tocker shocker!
  • Did you hear about the clock who got promoted? Now it’s a top-ticker!
  • Time to get in shape? Just run circles around the clock!
  • Why did the clock start a blog? It had striking thoughts to share.
  • Spring forward or fall back? Clocks are always facing a time crisis.
  • I was going to make fun of the clock, but then I realized it’s about time I stopped.
  • Why was the clock so bad at math? It long ago stopped counting on itself.
  • The clock at the bar got a round of applause – it was happy hour!
  • When you call a clock store, be prepared to wait… They always put you on hold.

Check Out: Top 100 Key Puns From Cars to Keyboards

Clock One-Liners

  • Two clocks walk into a bar. The barman says, Now that’s a timing coincidence!
  • I told my clock we should go out. It said, Time to leave!
  • I asked the clock for its opinion, and it said, It’s about time you asked.
  • Clocks never win arguments – they’re always beating around the bush.
  • Why did the clock teacher struggle? Because time-tables were his enemy!
  • My watch broke, but it’s okay. Time heals all wounds.
  • Ever seen a clock fight? It’s a display of really powerful timing maneuvers.
  • A man with a broken clock is always right – at least twice a day.
  • My digital clock dreams of becoming analog – it’s longing for tick-tock.
  • A clock holds a grudge forever. It never forgets old times.

Check Out: 120+ Hilarious House Puns to Brighten Your Day

Best Clock Jokes

  • Why did the clock go to therapy? It was having time management issues.
  • Did you hear the one about the clock who told a joke? It had everyone in stitches – it was sew funny!
  • How do you catch a runaway clock? With a time net.
  • What’s a clock’s favorite dessert? Timetaffy!
  • Why do clocks always get promotions? Because they’re great at keeping time.
  • Why did the clock form a rock band? To tick to the beat.
  • Never tell a clock to stand still – it’s always on the second shift.
  • Why did the clock join the choir? It had perfect time-ing.
  • There was a party at the clock’s house and it was a blast. Everyone had a tick-ing good time!
  • Clocks love a good workout. They’re always running down their batteries.

Check Out: 140+ Hilarious Furniture Puns to Brighten Your Day (Sit Back and Laugh)

Best Clock Puns

  • I wanted to cook but realized I was running out of thyme.
  • My clock and I decided to part ways – I just couldn’t handle the tick-tention.
  • Do clocks get younger? No, they just wind back!
  • Why did the clock read a book? To pass the time!
  • A clock’s favorite game? Tic-tac-tock!
  • What’s a clock’s pet peeve? People who waste its time.
  • Why did the clock start meditating? To find inner peace and time.
  • Clocks have the most hands-on jobs – literally!
  • When clocks get heated, they might even start to… strike!
  • Why don’t clocks tell jokes by themselves? They prefer a secondhand entertainer.

Check Out: 100+ Funniest Tool Puns to Nail Your Next Conversation

Clock Puns and Jokes

  • What did the digital clock say to the analog clock? Look who’s keeping up with the times now!
  • My clock told me a secret… It was quite alarming!
  • What do you call a beaver with a broken clock? Time dammed.
  • How do you fix a broken clock? With tick-tape!
  • The clock’s favorite dance? The tick-tock stroll!
  • Why did the clock sit quietly in the corner? It was trying to unwind.
  • My clock enjoys reading… It’s always ahead of its time in novels.
  • The clock was short-tempered. It always blew a fuse at the slightest hour-delay.
  • The clock had plans but canceled… No time left on the docket!
  • Clocks are great storytellers; they’ve got all the time in the world.

Check Out: 140+ Wallet Puns (Your Pocket-Sized Dose of Hilarity)

Short Clock Puns

  • Tick-tock therapy: It’s about time!
  • Why did the clock go on a diet? To lose its spare time.
  • Clockwork angels beat in synchronous heart-time.
  • When does a clock hit at the bar? Happy hour.
  • Clocks can’t dance – they’ve got two left hands.
  • Time waits for no clock – it’s always ahead.
  • Got a broken clock? Fix it with tick-tape!
  • Have you heard about the clock revolution? It’s about time!
  • Broken clock humor: Always time-less!
  • A clock in disguise: It’s incog-nito-tick!

Check Out: 120+ Hilarious Book Puns (A Collection of Page-Turners Jokes)

We hope these clock puns kept you hour-guing for more and helped you pass the time with a smile on your face.

Clocks might just be tools to keep track of time, but with a pinch of humor, they can also tickle your funny bone.

Until next time, keep tick-tocking and enjoy every second!