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120+ Rugby Puns to Tackle Your Funny Bone

An illustrated group of rugby balls enjoying a comedy show, each with a face and laughing, in a cozy club setting with a microphone on stage, surrounded by a dimly lit audience of sports equipment.

Ready to scrum down into some rib-tickling humor? If you’ve got a love for rugby and can appreciate a good pun, you’re in the right place.

Whether you’re on the pitch or on the couch, these puns are sure to score a few laughs.

Let’s dive into some rugby hilarity that’ll tackle your funny bone!

Scrum-ptious Rugby Puns

  • Why did the rugby player go to jail? He rucked up too many times!
  • What do rugby players eat for breakfast? Scrum-bled eggs!
  • Why was the rugby player so good at gardening? He had a knack for scrums!
  • Why do rugby players make great chefs? Because they really know how to ruck a recipe!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of music? Scrum and bass!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get lost? They always follow the hooker!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? I get a kick out of you!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? To try the scrum machine!
  • How do rugby players stay cool during a game? They stand next to the fans!
  • Why was the rugby field so good at math? Because it had lots of points!

Hilarious Rugby Puns

  • Why don’t rugby players ever get sunburnt? Because they always play in a scrum-mage!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite instrument? The tackling-drum!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a ladder to the match? To reach the high tackle!
  • Why did the referee go to school? To learn how to blow the whistle!
  • How did the rugby player find his red card? It was right in front of his try!
  • Why was the rugby team great at improv? They were always ready for a quick ruck and joke!
  • What did the rugby coach say to his team? Keep your friends close and your ruck-ers closer!
  • What position do ghosts play in rugby? Fly-half-spook!
  • Why was the rug always late for practice? Because it kept getting tackled underfoot!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite bird? The try-chicken!

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Funny Rugby Puns

  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite ice cream flavor? Scrum and raisin!
  • How do rugby players relax? They throw in the towel!
  • Why did the rugby player visit the barber? To get a short back and sides!
  • What’s a rugby player’s dream car? A Scrum-bro!
  • Why was the rugby player’s calendar always full? They never missed an engagement!
  • What do rugby players call a fancy party? A ruck-tail event!
  • Why don’t rugby players play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding a whole scrum!
  • What did the rugby player say before the match? Let’s tackle this head-on!
  • Why was the rugby player always calm? Because he never lost his rucks!
  • Why was the rugby player always focused? Because he had his try on the prize!

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Rugby One-liners

  • Rugby players and pancakes have one thing in common, they both like a good flip!
  • Rugby players wear so much padding, they could double as Michelin mascots!
  • If rugby was easy, it’d be called soccer!
  • My rugby team is good at many things, but singing in harmony isn’t one of them – we’re more of a scrum quartet.
  • A day without rugby is like, just kidding, I have no idea what that’s like!
  • I told my wife I play rugby; she said it was a rucking good excuse to hang out with mates!
  • I’d rather be rugby-t like a diamond!
  • Rugby: where the weak are killed and eaten!
  • If you can’t take the heat, stay out of the scrum!
  • Rucks and scrums may break my bones, but I’ll always come back for more!

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Best Rugby Jokes

  • Why did the rugby team go to the library? They wanted to brush up on their kick-sticks!
  • What happens to a rugby player when it rains? They get a little ruck-slick!
  • Why was the rugby player such a good detective? Because he always knew how to tackle a problem!
  • How do rugby players avoid sunburn? They try to sidestep the rays!
  • What position do skunks play? Full-back-stink!
  • Why did the rugby player bring string to the game? So he could tie his opponents into knots!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get caught cheating? They know how to scrum-ble out of trouble!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite drink? A scrum-tini!
  • Why is playing rugby like owning a dog? Because you get loyal teammates that won’t leave you on the field!
  • How did the rugby player propose? With a ring-side seat and a tackle!

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Best Rugby Puns

  • If rugby was easy, it’d be called soccer-rug!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite style of bread? A roll-out!
  • Why do rugby players make bad secret agents? They’re terrible at tackling double agents!
  • Why was the rugby player always invited to parties? Because he knew how to ruck the house!
  • Do rugby players ever get bored? No, they just kick it!
  • Why are rugby players like iPhones? They both need frequent updates and get a lot of ruck attention!
  • What do you get when you cross a turkey and a rugby player? A ruckey player!
  • How do rugby players send secret letters? By scrum-mail!
  • What’s a rugby team’s favorite type of bear? A hugger, because they like to huddle!
  • Why did the rugby team always win arguments? They never lost their scrum!

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Rugby Puns and Jokes

  • Why did the rugby player visit the bakery? To get a scrumptious treat!
  • What do you call a rugby player who sings? A ruck-star!
  • Why was the rugby match canceled? Because the pitch got typhoon-tackled!
  • How do rugby players greet each other? They say, “What’s T-rucking on?”
  • Why did the rugby player become an actor? Because he was always in the spotlight for losing the props!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite season? Fall, because they love to tackle leaves!
  • Why do rugby players make great comedians? Because they knock over the competition!
  • What did the rugby player say to his date? You’re a try to behold!
  • Why was the rugby field always green? Because it got a lot of rain-tackles!
  • How do rugby players like their coffee? With a scrum of sugar!

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Short Rugby Puns

  • Rugby players love to ruck n’ roll!
  • The rugby team can’t bear to lose their mascot – a teddy bear!
  • Rugby is a scrum-believable sport!
  • Can you handle a rugby tackle? If not, just scrum away!
  • Rugby players have their heads in the game and their hearts on the line!
  • Life is better with a bit of rucking around!
  • Rugby players don’t sweat, they scrum-ble!
  • Every day is a good day for rugby!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite color? Try-green!
  • Rugby players’ favorite game? Hide and ruck-seek!

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Final Words

Well, there you have it! A scrum-tastically delicious collection of rugby puns ready to tackle any dull moment and convert it into a try-mendous laugh fest.

Whether you’re a die-hard rugby enthusiast or just someone who loves a good chuckle, I hope you found these puns as entertaining as a last-minute match-winning try.

Now go forth and ruck the world with your newfound humor!